What happened? In April, I looked forward to a sunny May and June, with a lot of quality family time, time to meet friends for some wine and dine and working out.
Today, I look back on one family beach visit, one wine and dine evening with friends and a lot of working hours. Soaked in deadlines, I must admit that I was naive! Everybody wants to finish their work before the summer vacation, and everybody wants to have a June summer party!
I had to ask myself – How do I recharge my batteries fast? Have can I live my diverse life in small doses?
5 Habits That Will Boost Your Energy!
1) Work-out! Being active and working out is my drug. Get up in the morning and do it before work! I KNOW! It is so hard to get out of bed! Imagine your joy, when you are done! Nothing beats the good and proud feeling of having worked out before work.
2) Go to bed early, get up early! At 9-10 pm, I start my evening routine. Success doesn’t sleep in the morning! I never set an alarm clock, since I am lucky to have two toddlers who wake my up around 6 am every day.
3) Take breaks during your busy day! No one can work all day long! Have lunch with your colleagues, cycle to work or spend time with your kids. I try to log-off 100 % from I get home and until the boys are sleeping. My experience is that I am more productive if I take some breaks.
4) Have sex! It feels a bit awkward to bring up sex on a leadership blog. Yet, it is an important energy source. And very important, in order to keep a healthy marriage!
5) Have fun with your friends! But not every night! So far in May- June, I have had one very fun and great night out with friends. We had some drinks. We went to a concert. We went to bed late! (And I had to get up at 6 am…)
5 Habits That Will Drain Your Energy!
1) Staying up late zapping the TV or surfing social media. Zap off. Log off! Go to bed and get some sleep!
2) Too much alcohol and too little water! ! A glass of wine in the sunset is great. A bottle will ruin your tomorrow! Number 1 and 2 in my To Do list will be difficult and eat your energy level out! On the flip side, water is essential for your energy level. Make a habit of bringing a water bottle every day!
3) Checking your phone after 11 pm! Make a habit of leaving your phone outside the bedroom! Your brain needs time to relax.
4) Skipping breakfast or eat junk food! You are what you eat. A roller coaster blood sugar level will increase your feeling of fatigue.
5) Saying Yes to everything! I am working on this one! It is perfectly okay to say No to invitations and new tasks!
Finally, I must share a big celebration! This is my blog post number 100!!!!! One year ago, I started my work on this blog! I want to use this opportunity to share my deepest gratitude to you guys, my readers! Thanks for reading my blog posts, giving me feedback and motivating me to inspire others!
This blog is also an important energy source! It forces me to reflect, relax and take a stand!
Have a fantastic June weekend! I have some busy weeks ahead of me. But I count the days until our summer vacation! Stay tuned, I will tell you more about our plans! Luckily, I have found my energy resources to keep on going!
Hey! Do you know someone who needs to boost the energy level? Pleas feel free to share my blog post!
Warm summer smiles,
PS – Who to follow Snapchat business – add ceciliaflatum
Close your eyes. Imagine….the opening of the XXVI Olympic Winter Games 2032 in Oslo. The newly elected IOC president has just opened the games. Her opening remarks are broadcasted to more than three billion viewers. Athletes from all over the world are walking down the main street Karl Johan, waving to the engaged audience.
The IOC president is accompanied by the top executives, men and women, from the eight winter sports federations. The new FIFA president is invited to the winter capital of the world. She’s from the African continent and is not used to the cold weather. She shivers as she exhales the frosty air. The president of the World Snowboard Federation hands her his jacket. They rise and join the singing crowd!
Open your eyes. Was there something weird about your dream? Not really. It is 2032! We all know that gender inequality in sports expired two years ago!
24 intense hours in Bergen!
This week, I attended a round-table debate in Bergen, Norway. It was hosted by two ministers from our government, the Minister of Culture and Sports Linda Hofstad Helleland and the Minister of Children and Equality Solveig Horne.
I had looked forward to this meeting for weeks! I felt really humble, when I met the other participants. Great women with a tremendous amount of experience.
Anita L. De France, the first woman the be elected a vice president of the IOC executive board. Isha Johansen, the president of the Sierra Leonean Football Association. Kristin Helle, director of strategic partnerships from UN Women. Kristin Kloster Aasen, the 1. vice president of the Norwegian Olympic and Paralympic committee and Confederation of Sports. Guri Hetland, CEO of Trondheim 2021 and coach. Dominique Niyonizigiye, responsible for the gender equality program in the IOC. Tove Moe Dyrhaug, managing director, Rosenborg Football Club. Karen Marie Ellefsen, a “living legend” sports journalist from Norwegian Broadcasting. Ruth Holdaway, CEO of Women in Sports. Sarah Lewis, secretary general from FIS. Birgit Skarstein, paralympic athlete and world champion. Runa Møller Tangstad, a young leader from the Youth Olympic Games 2016.
For 24 hours, we shared experiences and stories. We got to know each other, had serious discussion and some good laughs. Finally, we met for a basketball match, coached by the Marco Elsafadi.
We all love sports! It’s a world language. No matter gender, ethnicity, age or religion, we have fun together, playing or watching. Yet, looking at the numbers reflecting who controls the world of sport, on a national and international level, it’s a man’s world.
Only 41 out of 404 presidents and secretary generals in the world of sports are women.
At the latest FIFA congress, two out of 207 voting members were women.
Norway is in the world lead when it comes to gender equality, but in sports we are lagging behind other industries.
Studies made by Women in Sports in UK, show that women’s sport sponsorship accounted for only 0.4% of total sports sponsorship between 2011 and 2013.
Studies made by Tucker Center at the University of Minnesota, show that women are 40 % of all sports participants. But they only get 4 % of all sport media coverage. In addition, the sports women are presented in more sexually provocative poses, compared to the men.
The organizational structure of sports are defined and created by men. Leadership positions attract more men, than women. Some claim that the working hours (often evenings and weekends) and amount of traveling, if you are a top executive on a national or international level, scare women off. Some of these barriers are real, others are in our minds.
If your husband can work with sports during some weekends, why can’t you? I guess you already are investing a lot of hours into sports, but doing other tasks.
In many countries and organizations, we have glass ceilings. Some places a concrete roof! Many of the women in top executive position are super tough. They just went for it, and some didn’t crash through any ceilings!
I strongly believe that we need to break some ceilings, in order to create a greater diversity. By diversity, I mean gender, ethnicity, age and background.
Why does the world of sports have a problem?
Too little diversity on the top executive level is negative for the world of sports.
The index provider MSCI presented a study in 2015. 1.643 companies had been analyzed. The findings showed a 36 % higher return on equity, when MSCI compared organizations with strong female leadership with organizations without women at the most senior levels. I claim that these results also goes for to sport organizations.
Diversity is top executive positions is good for the financial bottom line.
Sport organizations and events will, eventually, be less attractive to sponsors. A recent example is the demand from the sponsor of the Oxford / Cambridge boat race. The sponsor demand was unequivocal:
Move the women’s race to the championship course on the Tideway alongside the men’s and give both equal funding or the deal is off.
I wish more sponsors made these kind of demands! If the top management is a silver fox blazer brigade discriminating women in sport. Make demands or move your money elsewhere.
By not including women in the top executive positions, we don’t fulfill the potential of the population. I am sure that more women in top executive positions, is crucial to increase the recruitment and development of better condition for girls and women, all levels, all ages, as athletes, judges or coaches.
A priority in the C-suite…
As for any big strategic change, gender equality must be a priority, for men and women, in the C-suite (a corporation’s most important senior executives). There must be a political will from the top. Strategies must be decided upon and be followed up. Laws and policies must be changed. Leaders must walk the talk.
The IOC has put forward the strategic initiativ, the 2020 Agenda. Gender equality is a stand alone goal, but also an integrated goal integrated into the other strategic development goals. Now, it is up to IOC president Thomas Bach to make sure his initiative gets implemented, and does not end up as dusted “paper tiger”.
We need more leaders like the Canadian prime minister Justin Trudeau, who named a gender balanced cabinet “because it’s 2015”.
Our minister of children and equality Solveig Horne said it perfectly right, we can all start cleaning up our backyard.
If you are you already in a top executive position, make diversity a priority and walk the talk. It is a danger that CXO women can be dancing on the glass ceiling and not recognize the need to work longterm and include women with other leadership skills and personalities.
Are you a mother supporting your kids in their daily sport activities. You take them to training. You clean their football shirt. You wax their snowboard. You make and sell waffles. You are already putting in many hours. Transform these hours into leadership of your local club. You make a difference for the local generation in your neighborhood.
Can we make an agreement, sister?
Since I came home, I have been thinking about how I can contribute. My blog is an obvious channel. I also want to get involved in my local community as my twin boys are growing up. I also hope, I can continue to contribute in the follow-up work from the round-table meeting.
How about you? Can we make an agreement, sister?
Next time someone ask you to a take on a board position (even if it the position as the chair person), say Yes!
Apply to that vacant interesting leader position in a sport organization. And if they don’t ask you! Just ask for it!
Lean into to the world of sports! Join the movement. Lean in, because we need your competence and perspectives! It all starts with the small steps.
No woman can change the world alone. But single actions or comments can change someones life.
You can make some ripples in a deep and wide ocean. Together, we can make some waves and change the landscape of sports! Diversity creates a better future for the world of sports!
We don’t have to wait for 2032. The journey is happening, but we must speed it up!
Women and men, mothers, fathers or any engaged soul, lean into to the world of sports! We need you all!
Have a great and active Sunday!
Feel free to share this blog post, in your social media!
The joint statement from the round-table meeting in Bergen!
We all love him! The creative genious! The co-founder, chairman, and CEO of Apple! The pioneer who never gave up! It’s almost five years since he passed away, but his legacy lives, both in our daily products and way of thinking.
These are my 15 favorite Steve Jobs quotes.
The 15 quotes!
1) People with passion can change the world for better!
2) Stay hungry. Stay foolish! (Stanford University Commencement Adress, 2005)
3) Sometimes life is going to hit you in the head with a brick. Don’t lose faith! (Stanford*)
4) Don’t let the noise of others’ opinions drown out your own inner voice! (Stanford*)
5) Your time is limited. Don’t waste it living someone else’s life. (Stanford*)
6) I have looked in the mirror every morning and asked myself: ‘If today were the last day of my life, would I want to do what I am about to do today?’ And whenever the answer has been ‘No‘ for too many days in a row, I know I need to change something. (Stanford*)
7) You think focusing is about saying ‘Yes!‘ Focusing is about saying ‘No.‘ And when you say ‘No,‘ you piss off people! (Apple WWDC Closing Keynote, 1997)
8) That’s been one of my mantras – focus and simplicity. Simple can be harder than complex, you have to work hard to get your thinking clean to make it simple. (BusinessWeek, May 25, 1998)
9) Sometimes when you innovate, you make mistakes. It is best to admit them quickly, and get on with improving your other innovations. (I, Steve: Steve Jobs In His Own Words, 2001)
10) Innovation distinguishes between a leader and a follower. (The Innovation Secrets of Steve Jobs, 2001)
11) I’m convinced that about half of what separates the successful entrepreneurs from the non-successful ones is pure perseverance.
12) My favorite things in life don’t cost any money. It’s really clear that the most precious resource we all have is time. (Playboy, February, 1985)
13) Being the richest man in the cemetery doesn’t matter to me … Going to bed at night saying we’ve done something wonderful … that’s what matters to me. (The Wall Street Journal, May 25, 1993)
14) The only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven’t found it yet, keep looking. Don’t settle. As with all matters of the heart, you’ll know when you’ve found it. (Stanford*)
15) Here’s to the crazy ones — the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes. The ones who see things differently — they’re not fond of rules. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can’t do is ignore them because they change things. They push the human race forward, and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do. (Apple Computer Ad, 1997)
I have an exciting day ahead of me. I’m in Bergen! Some months ago, I was invited by the minister of culture and sports to a round-table debate concerning women in top positions within sports! You don’t say no to a minister! So, here I am!
Last year, I wrote a chronicle in a daily news paper in Norway. The theme was Women in sports – Lean in! I am reposting it today in English! Happy reading!
Today’s special! Leadership and Life Snap Chat!
If you want to follow my next 24 hours at the round-table debate, add my new SnapChat account Leadership and Life!
Women In Sports! Lean In! (Published in Dagsavisen June 15, 2015)
The board of directors in The Norwegian Olympic and Paralympic Committee and Confederation of Sports has a good female representation, but the percentage of women in executive positions in sports politics is decreasing. The president of the Norwegian Football Association, stated in June 2015, that we must use gender quotas more. I do not believe that this is the only strategy. Organizations must facilitate the long-term development of both technical, administrative and political leaders. Perhaps those who have been in a top executive position for a “lifetime” should know when it is time to let go, and let others take over. Women must give themselves and other women support, and perhaps a kick in the butt.
A personal story
A friend of mine recently contacted me, telling me that she was asked to take a position on the board of directors in a sports organization. The election committee representative told her that she was asked primarily because she was female, and that they had to fill the women’s quota. She is, in my opinion, very much qualified for the position, but the fact that they were required fill the women’s quota seemed more important than her qualifications.
For years, I have been interested in increasing the percentage of female leaders and being a role model myself, both in the world of sports and in my job as a partner in Deloitte.
During the 2000’s, The Norwegian Snowboard Federation conducted the project PowderPuff Girls. Three young sports leaders wanted more female leaders, judges, TD’s etc. The project was started on their own initiative. After the project had made some progress, the board was asked for support, and the association contributed by providing facilitation. The project was quickly recognized by the entire community, and received a lot of attention. The result was more women in various positions, such as several potential board members and one president.
In order to get more women into board and top executive positions, both women and the organization must facilitate. I do not have the solution, but I do have some thoughts and input.
Make sure that election committees have a diversity, when it comes to gender, age and ethnicity.
Plan long-term, and identify female leader talents early on. Facilitate and make sure that women are challenged in terms of tasks and roles. Women are often evaluated in terms of what they have achieved, while men are often evaluated in terms of what their potential is. Be aware of that, the next time you assess candidates!
Internal women projects should as far as possible be run by resources with a strong inner motivation, vs. board-decided top-down projects. The projects should involve both women and men. The project owner should be in the top management.
Show trust by facilitating for the projects, instead of managing and controlling, by giving economic support, assist with administration and communication.
Have an open dialogue about the top executives internally, administratively and politically. Today’s top executives should continuously consider whether it is time to step down. New and younger talents, both women and men, could be what is necessary to take the organization to the next level.
Do not doubt your qualifications! The nomination committee has done this assessment, and there is a reason for why they asked you. Look around. It is not as if today’s top executives are superhuman.
Lean in! Ask someone to suggest you as a candidate, or do it yourself. Show your strengths and make yourself available. Update your CV on LinkedIn, register your name in board databases etc.
Promote yourself! Remember that the position is not secure even if the committee nominates you. Get influential people to support your candidacy. The reelected board member Marcela Bustos is a very good example of how to do the latter.
Set boundaries and delegate! Clearly state what your available time and prioritization is.
Be part of the top executive community! Use your relations to other top executives in order to receive advice and discuss matters.
Create your own leadership style! Do not attempt to copy your predecessor. Take advantage of the opportunity. Norwegian sports needs diversity, including the top executives.
Some weeks ago, I attended TEDx Oslo. A truly inspirational day! Where ever I looked, people in the audience had stars in their eyes. This is religion! For us, this was Christmas eve, New year’s eve and a birthday celebration, all in one day!
The challenge – Be the Change
When all the great TEDx talkers had left the stage. It was time for the audience to lean in. A contest was launched. 10 people would be picked to be a part of the Be The Change program. The challenge penetrated my heart. I had to do, what must be done to be a part of this program. I caught the challenge on my camera, before I ran off!
My Application For The TEDx 2016 Challenge, Be The Change
Below I have copied parts of my application.
1) TEDx Oslo 2016 – the most inspirational talk and why!
I have always admired women standing out from the crowd. Women with a clear message, challenging the established. For me, the 10 points went to Elise By Olsen. I think everybody in the audience were surprised when a young women with pink hair entered the stage. Elise gave us a clear message and new insight.
Elise is a true role model. She is an important role model for her generation Z. And she is different, giving us a diversity in role models. You can watch her TEDx talk here -> YouTube – Elise By Olsen – TEDxOslo
2) Where in life am I today?
Many times I have been the first (or youngest woman) in new positions, both in my business life and being a sports politician. I am a twin mother, a business leader in a male dominated industry, a spouse, a globetrotter and a blogger. I use my blog to show the world that you CAN be a leader and have a life.
Role models is key part of my inner motivation. I strongly believe, that there are too few female role models in top executive positions, both in numbers and diversity. Some diversity might be out there, but different female CXO role models are difficult to spot.
Media loves to expose the extreme versions. They call them Taarnfrids! A caricatured super business woman running in high heels. She is closing business deals on her cell phone, while leaving her sad looking son, dressed in a suit and bike helmet, in a locker at the central station. Or CXOs who did not take any maternity leave. I do not condemn their choices. There is no one size fits all. We need more real role models!
3) Where do I want to be in one year?
A secret! 😉 I will not share this part of my application! Stay tuned, and follow my journey! 😉
I waited and waited. I checked and checked my e-mail. The decision was postponed. But finally, Thursday morning, it was there! It is a fact! I am one of the ten lucky ones to be at part of the Tedx Oslo Be the Change program!
I hope you will follow my “Be The Change” journey here on my blog!
PS – Follow an inspirational business leader on Snapchat – add ceciliaflatum
A friend of mine just called. She had attended a meeting, where the person who asked for the meeting made her feel invisible and ridicule. He used well-known suppression techniques. She knew they had different interests. She had prepared her message well. But she got totally paralyzed, when he arrived late, gave a monologue and left the meeting!
I Could Not Sleep!
Suppression techniques! That’s what we call them. I have experienced it so many times. My worst experience was a negotiation some years ago. The top management did not show up to meetings or responded to our calls. They made us feel invisible. Whatever we presented, it was not good enough or they just ignored us.
Normally, I am a cool cat. But a lot was at stake. I felt insecure, frustrated and angry! I laid awake night after night or I would go snowboarding to reflect. Why didn’t I do this or say that? How do we deal with it?
The five suppression techniques!
Doing research for this blog post, I found out that the expression suppression techniques, hersketeknikker, came from a Norwegian, the psychologist and philosopher Ingjald Nissen. He analyzed it in 1945 his book Dictatorship of the psychopath, where he discussed the German catastrophe. (Source: Wikipedia).
The expression was later popularized by the Norwegian politician and feminist Berit Ås. She defined five general suppression techniques.
Invisibility – when you are forgotten, overruled or bypassed. Just like my negotiation experience.
Ridicule – when you get laughed at, mocked or compared with animal behavior.
Retention of information – when you do not get the information you are supposed to or bypassed.
Condemnation – whatever you do it is not good enough. You do your best, and the response is always too passive or too ongoing. I would say that Sheryl Sandberg’s statement about women, unfairly, being called “bossy” is a clear suppression technique.
Inflict of blame and guilt – you get ridiculed, humiliated, exposed and defamed. One example is “Don’t worry your pretty face”.
How can awareness of suppression techniques be your weapon?
Do I use suppression techniques? Oh yes! I have retained information. I have made people feel invisible. But I never ridiculed or made people feel guilty. I guess my strategy is smaller actions. Like many women using suppression techniques, mine are often “backstage”.
I am very aware of meeting set-ups. Where and how do I sit at the table. Don’t sit at the far end. Sit next or opposite to the most influential person in the room. Or place yourself to be the most influential person in the room. Elevate your chair. Stand up if you make presentations. Invite people to your home ground, if you want to win the battle.
I am very aware of how I speak. Do I address someone by their last name or surname? I inform consciously, what and in which sequence. I am aware of how I use my voice.
I am very aware of how I act. A typical female suppression technique is to put my hand on someones shoulder or arm when I make a statement. A Norwegian top politician, today – the secretary of the treasury Siv Jensen, once asked if she could kiss her opponent, today – NATO secretary general, Jens Stoltenberg. I have not done this yet :).
I hope this blog post has increased your awareness. In my next blog post, I will share my best advice on how to deal with suppression techniques!
As you might have noticed, I have many irons in the fire! Maybe, too many? Since Easter, I feel like I have been doing something 24/7. Twins, work, blog, more work, working-out, more work, too little sleep and more. I always try to be efficient and get the most of the day. It is good to get things done, but my brain has suffered from information overload. Is my effectiveness my worst enemy?
My brain needed a break
I felt a need to do nothing and log off. A long weekend at my parents farm up north was just what I needed. Four days at low speed, spending valueable time with my family. The valley is far away from everything and close to nature. The internet connection is slow. My mobile network does not reach the farm, at the very end of the valley. Perfect! I was forced to log off and downshift.
I have enjoyed doing “nothing”! Going to bed before 10 pm and sipping my morning coffee at 6 am. I have had some morning runs accompanied by complete silence, only broken by singing spring birds. My eyes have rested the slowly moving green stream, from the nearby glacier. Plenty of time with my twins and walks in beautiful surroundings. Being away from the busy city life and doing nothing has been like a vitamin pill.
Doing nothing is good for your mental health
It feels like my brain has been down and re-booted. Research shows that doing nothing is good for our mental health. The scientist Andres Smart, the author of Auto-Pilot: The Art and Science of Doing Nothing, used the latest findings in neuroscience to show that our brains need idleness. As a matter of fact, doing nothing leads to happiness. (Source: Tom Hodgkinson, Independent.co.uk)
My own experience is that doing nothing has been good.
I breath slower
I get new ideas
I have time to reflect and think things through
My brain feels more sorted
I have more energy
I am ready for a new week! I hope, you feel the same!
Last night, I went to the Adele concert in Oslo. This was THE concert happening of the year in Norway! The arena was packed. Adele! What a woman. What an artist! She blew us all off!
It has been some years, since my last concert. This was the best comeback concert ever. By far, one of the best concerts I have been to.
Hit after hit after. Her voice is spectacular, her lyrics dramatic (a lot about love :)) and she sings to our hearts! Adele is authentic. She shares her story and passion. That’s why we love her! A lot of personality and humor. This lady is one of a kind, and she is only 28!
After the concert, I was inspired! Here are five key take aways that any leader can learn from Adele!
5 Leadership Advices – Adele Style
1) See people and be interested. What’s your employees story? Give a compliment! Do you know your employees birthdays? Dare you to take lead on their birthday song?
2) Don’t act like a primadonna with your nose in the air. Okay, you are the leader and you believe you are important, but get your nose down.
3) Don’t let anyone ruin your life! If you have anyone that annoys you over a long time, don’t let them ruin your life. Tell them to F*** off! Hehe, these where Adele’s exact words!
4) It’s okay to be nervous! Adele is a super artist. She shared stories about how she is nervous before a concert.
5) Work is important, but remember that the most important in your life is your children! Remember to get out of the office in time, to be there when they grow up!
And I just have to share two leadership thoughts on some lyrics!
Hello, it’s me! I was wondering if after all these years you’d like to meet. Relations are important, both in your professional and private life! It’s never too late to pick up the phone and say – Hello! And take it from there.
Do you see my heart on my sleeve? A famous Norwegian football coach often talked about playing with your heart on the outside of your shirt. I believe the same goes for the business world. Lead with your heart on your sleeve. People will find you more authentic, believe in you and the vision and eventually follow!
Definitely a great experience, which I shared with this three girls, my best friend, my niese and her friend!
I am on a mission, on a search, and some weeks ago I asked for help! Can you readers and my followers in social media help me to find the best female leadership blogs (-> Help me – I am searching for the best leadership blogs).
I have received so many good suggestions! Right now, I am wondering how to find time to check them all out. Maybe, I need to invite some friends over for a blog day, where we go through them all? Please, let me know if you want to join! 🙂
But right now, it’s Sunday! Here is the list! Wow, approximately 50 female leadership bloggers! I get goosebumps! 😉 I am going to check out these women!
The Best Female Leadership Blogs!
Take a look! Find your favorites! Be inspired by a whole lot of girl power!
Super Tuesday! This week, my advice is short and might seem simple. Just say no! Still for many of us, saying no can be very difficult!
If you have checked out my Instagram lately, you know that I’m a fan of quotes. A couple of weeks ago, I posted this one:
“I can’t give you a sure-fire formula for success, but I can give you a formula for failure: try to please everybody all the time.”
The famous quote belongs to Herbert Bayard Swope, the first recipient of the Pulitzer Prize for Reporting in 1917 (www.goodreads.com).
Say no with style
The following weeks, I had several episodes where friends asked me for advice. One was afraid to burn bridges, if she spoke out how she really felt about a specific subject. Another friend, said yes to everybody. Now, she was running from one task to the other. The days did not have enough hours.
My reply to both – My recipe for failure, try to please everybody!
The quote is an important reminder! Sometimes, it is perfectly fine to say no or stand up for your opinions. It is normal to feel uncomfortable, when you say no. You feel guilt, especially if have the competence and your heart says: Yes! We are also afraid to be rejected and not asked again.
Most important, it is so easy to say – Yes! It feels so good and everybody are happy! The only problem is that you have too much on your plate already. Now, you added another task to your long list. The people will just be disappointed, when they realize that nothing is happening.
Don’t say maybe, if you want to say no!
When you say no, you have to do it with style, humility and confident. Do not fall into the maybe trap! Show understanding and explain your situation. Practice loud with a colleague or in front of the mirror.
These days, I say no to after work and weekend activities. I get invited to several social gatherings a week. It would be great join, but it jams my schedule. Sorry folks, but this twin mother knows her priorities!
Have a great Tuesday! Speak up or say no! I am sure you will feel relieved!